Greetings! I am writing this in a secret location. My two owners are outside and I fear that they may try to get me to swim again. Please make no mistake...the pool is not my friend.
As I write to you, paws tapping away on the typewriter, I am snacking on my new favorite guilty pleasure. No more shall I spend nights watching "Rock of Love" or even "The Bachelor" on Monday nights. I now pass the minutes by enjoying tiny morsels of fried potatoes, tossed in salt and vinegar, better known as Salt and Vinegar chips. Have you tried these? I adore them. And while they are the reason that I have gained 5 pounds, and cannot float while swimming, I must share their delicacy with you. With tainted breath, whiskers stained with salt, I tell you: I am back, hotties!